The Wearing of the green
by Cindy Gifford
The men of station 51 sat lounging around the day room. Chet sat on the sofa, half asleep, with Henry on top of him. Hank reclined at the other end of the leather couch, his long legs stretched out their full length. John and Roy both sat in chairs around the TV set as did Marco and Chet. The Disney film, "Darby O'Gill and the Little People" played on television set in front of them and the men were totally engrossed in the movie.
"Man," Marco exclaimed. "That little guy is something else!"
"He's not a "little guy"," Chet corrected without opening his eyes. "He's a leprechaun."
"Whatever, he's still funny!"
"Shhhhhh!" Johnny hissed at the pair. "I'm trying to listen."
"I don't know about this movie." Roy began. "It's kind of far fetched."
"Oh, come on, Roy," John snapped. "It's a Disney movie not a documentary!"
"I wouldn't jump to any conclusions, guys." Chet cautioned the men. "The leprechaun is taken very seriously in my home land."
"There are leprechaun's in Pasadena?" Marco asked, confused.
"I don't mean where my mother lives, I mean Ireland, where my family is originally from."
"Oh, come off it Chet." Johnny interjected. "Leprechaun's are just a legend. They're no more real then unicorns or dragons."
"I wouldn't jump to any hasty conclusions, Gage," Chet said as he sat up and pushed Henry aside. "My grandfather told me stories of the old days when he was a kid in Ireland and he actually met a leprechaun."
"Really?" Marco said as the men's interest changed from the movie to Chet's story.
"Really," Chet assured them. "He was walking home one night just as it was getting dark. All of a sudden out of the bushes popped the little guy."
"The leprechaun," Marco corrected.
"Right, the leprechaun." Chet continued as he nodded at Marco. "He followed him for over a mile before he disappeared into the side of a hill."
"Yeah, right Chet. How much had he had to drink?" John said, doubting Chet's story.
"Nothing Gage. He was 11 at the time. Anyway, it's a well known fact that if you can capture a leprechaun he will lead you to his pot of gold."
"Speaking of pots," Captain Stanley interrupted. "Isn't dinner ready yet?"
"Oh, yeah. Let me check it," Roy said as he rose from his seat and headed for the stove. He lifted the lid on the big pot and gave the contents a stir. "I think it's about finished. Johnny, could you set the table?"
"Yeah, I guess so," John moaned as he stood and headed for the cabinet. A sly grin spread over Chet's face as he watched his pigeon approach the trap.
SPLASH!!!!!
In one swift movement, John Gage was coated in a thick, green goo. The room instantly exploded into a fit of laughing, with Chet leading the way.
"CHET!" John exploded. "What the hell is this!" Roy walked over and ran his finger down Johnny's cheek, gathering a generous portion of the slimy green substance then cautiously licked his finger.
"I think it's lime Jell-O." Roy said as he sucked on the end of his finger.
John fumed as he looked down at his sticky uniform. "Thanks a lot, Chet! Now I have to get a shower!"
"Well, hurry up, I'm starving!" Hank commented as he approached the disaster area. "What's for chow?"
"Irish stew." Roy said proudly.
"DeSoto made Irish stew?" Chet said in shock.
"Yes, I did. Why?"
"Only a real Irishman can make Irish stew."
"Hey, I'm Irish." Roy responded.
"Since when?" Chet challenged.
"My great grandmother on my father's side was one quarter Irish."
"Close enough!" Hank insisted raising his hands up and halting the sparing between the two men. "Chet, You get a mop and get this mess cleaned up. Roy, get the chow on the table. Marco, get the table set. John, go wash that GREEN crap off your face, you look like a Martian."
"Yes, sir." The men mumbled as they went about their business. Hank blew out a deep breath as he sat down at the table. Sometimes he felt like he was in charge of a bunch of kindergartners.
*******************
By the time Johnny got finished in the shower, the rest of the crew had already finished eating. He bounced into the kitchen, his clean shirt still hanging open and towel drying his hair.
"I hope you guys saved me some dinner." He said from underneath the towel.
"Don't worry Gage. Unfortunately, there's plenty left." Chet informed John as he made a face at his half full plate.
"Come on, Chet. It wasn't that bad." Roy said attempting to defend his cooking.
"It wasn't that good either." Chet responded, his hand on his stomach.
"It was fine, Kelly." Captain Stanley said sternly as he stared at Chet.
"Yes, sir. It was fine, sir. May I be excused so I can barf, sir?" Hank rolled his eyes and threw his head back, running his hand over his face, at Kelly's remark. Children, he thought. I'm in charge of a bunch of children.
"Well, dish me up some, Roy," John said as he dropped the towel down around his shoulders. "I'm hungry enough to eat a horse."
"So that's what you used in it!" Chet exclaimed as he got up from the table. "And here all these years my family used lamb!"
"Give it a rest, Chet," Mike said as he began to gather the dirty dishes.
"Yeah, Chet," Marco agreed. "It really wasn't all that bad. Leave Roy alone."
"OK, Fine. If anyone needs me, I'll be in the locker room looking for my antacid." They all watched as Chet left the room then all eyes focused on John as he lifted his fork to his mouth. He had the serving poised in front of his open mouth when he felt the four sets of eyes glaring at him.
"What?" John snapped, lowering his fork. The quartet quickly busied themselves cleaning the kitchen as John finally got the food into his mouth. He chewed slowly savoring the flavor.
"Well?" Roy asked softly as he leaned over his partners shoulder.
"Don't give up your day job." John told him as he continued to chew. Roy promptly snapped him on the back of the head with the towel he carried then returned to the sink helping the others with the dishes. John grinned playfully as he continued to eat.
********************
The dorm was dark with the only sounds being that of the soft snores of six tired firemen. John slept soundly with his arm thrown over his eyes and his mouth slightly open. Little did he know the phantom was at work and he was his target. He dreamt pleasantly as the dark figure moved toward him and did his evil deed before slipping back into the shadows.
Oh Johnny! The nurse in his dream giggled. Your incorrigible!
You ain't seen nothing yet! Johnny said with a swagger to his voice as he pulled the young nurse to him in a tight embrace. He smiled as he slowly lowered his head till their lips met. Her touch was electrifying and Johnny quickly seduced her into parting her full, luscious lips. The heat of their passion suddenly turned into searing fire. His mouth burned, not with passion but with excruciating pain!
Springing from his bed, Johnny flew through the dorm on the way to the latrine, coughing and choking all the way. Once there he threw on the lights and ran to the sink.
"CHET!!!!!" He screamed as he looked at his foaming mouth in the mirror. Quickly he grabbed hand full after hand full of water and doused his bubbling mouth.
The other men in the dorm leapt from their bunks as they heard John sprinting into the bathroom. They all instantly broke into laughter as they watched the white suds dribbled down his chin as John tried frantically to extinguish the froth. Once the lather had ceased falling from his lips, he turned toward the crew.
"Chet, I swear, I'll get you for this!" He spat.
"Hey, what did I do?" Chet asked innocently.
"What did you do!" John exclaimed as his hands rose into the air over his head. "You put Alka-Seltzer in my mouth while I was sleeping, that's what you did! You could have killed me!"
"Oh, come on Gage." Chet defended himself. "You probably just finally caught rabies from all those dogs you date!" John huffed and puffed with anger as he headed towards Chet. Drops of water still fell from his chin and his fists were clenched in rage. Captain Stanley quickly intervened as he stood between the two men. He held his hands out separating the two and looking very much like a crossing guard.
"Hold it, you two! I'm getting sick and tired of all this horseplay around the station."
"But Cap!" John proclaimed. "I didn't do anything but try and get some sleep."
"I don't care who started this but it is going to stop now! Do you two understand?"
"Yes, sir." They both mumbled.
"Now, everyone back to bed. Oh, and Chet."
"Yes, sir?"
"You've got latrine duty for the rest of the month."
"No surprise there," Chet uttered under his breath as he climbed back into his bunk.
"What was that, Kelly?" His Captain asked.
"I said, I'll clean them with great care, Cap." Chet informed his captain as he pulled the blanket over his head.
John spit and sputtered a few more times into the sink before heading back to his own bunk. Roy rested his elbow on the pillow and propped up his head as he looked at his partner.
"You OK?" He asked, trying not to show his amusement at the prank.
"Yeah, I'm fine," John said, disgustedly without removing his arm from over his eyes.
"Good. G'night." Roy said before curling up on his side and going to sleep.
"Yeah, whatever." John mumbled as his mind raced trying to figure out a way to out phantom the phantom.
***********************
"Psssst!"
John opened his eyes and looked around the dorm. Everyone was sleeping soundly. He placed his arm back over his eyes, trying to fall back asleep.
"PSSSSST!"
The sound hissed louder. This time John sat up in bed and looked around the room. All was still quiet. He let out a sigh and began to lay back down when he felt a tap on the top of his head. Startled, he shifted to the far side of his bunk and looked up on the dividing wall beside him. There sat a little man, dressed all in green. He wore a green felt derby hat on top of his tiny head with wisps of red hair peeking out from underneath. He smiled at John, winking his wee little eye.
"Top 'o the morning to ye!" He exclaimed softly as he tipped his hat to the stunned paramedic.
"What the........what the......" John stammered as he rubbed his eyes, not believing what he was seeing. "What the hell are you?"
"Johnny, me boy. Truly, I am disappointed. You don't know a leprechaun when ye see one with your own eyes?"
"A lep....lep.....leprechaun?"
"Aye, 'tis true."
"Well, what are you doing here?"
"I just stopped by to check on me boy, Chester."
"Your boy?"
"Aye, I promised his grandfather I would keep an eye on him. He has truly been a handful over these many years."
"Your telling me! Hey, can you get him to stop pulling pranks on me?"
"And what would I want to do that for? It's just a little harmless play."
"Harmless play! Your not the one on the receiving end!"
"OH, come now, boy. What would this place be without his creative highjinks. A bit boring, I would think?"
"Well, yeah. I guess so. But why does he have to pick on me?"
"Because he likes ye, John Gage. Chester has problems showing his feelings. So when he likes someone, he pulls pranks. What do ye think of Chester B?"
"I'd like him more if he wasn't always picking on me."
"My suggestion to you is this, pull a prank on him."
"Are you serious?"
"Aye, very. This will show Chester that you care for him, too. Maybe then he will be able to become your friend, without the pranks."
"Well, if your sure. I guess I could come up with something." John said as he rubbed his hand over his face, trying to think of an idea.
"Good luck, John Gage."
"Yeah, Thanks." John said as he again looked up on the dividing all, only to find it empty.
"Hey! Where's you go!" He exclaimed loudly.
"I'm right here, John," Roy mumbled from underneath his pillow. "Where did you think I went."
"Not you. I was talking to the....."
"The what?" Roy asked peeking out from under the covers. John looked around the room, quickly searching for the little man.
"Um.....nothing. Never mind."
"Whatever you say, John." Roy moaned as he rolled over and fell back to sleep.
John laid back down, his eyes nervously shifting from side to side. Had he really seen him or was it all a dream? He wasn't sure, but what he was sure of was the fact that he needed an accomplice if he was going to be able to out prank the master prankster.
********************
"Come on, Cap!" John begged. "You've gotta help me with this!"
"Why me?" Hank wondered as he stared at John as he sat behind his desk. "I am the Captain around here, remember? I am suppose to be the one maintaining order, not creating havoc."
"I'm not asking you to create havoc, sir. All I need you to do is give Chet a reason to be out of my way for a little bit so I can get set up."
"I don't know about this, Gage."
"Come on, sir. Don't you want the pranks to stop?"
"Yes, I would love the pranks to stop, but how come my allowing you to pull a prank is going to stop Chet from pulling other pranks.
"Trust me, Cap. I have it from a reliable source."
"Like who?"
"That's not important. Just trust me. My plan is fool proof. Can I count on you?" Hank let out a long sigh before replying.
"I have a feeling I am going to live to regret this but, yeah, you can count on me."
"Great!" John said as he rubbed his hands together. "See you next shift."
*****************
John entered the station whistling a happy tune at the beginning of his next shift. Roy sat on the bench in front of his locker as he changed into his uniform. He looked up and raised an eyebrow at the good mood of his partner.
"What are you so happy about?" He asked as John began to change his clothing.
"I'm just happy, that's all."
"Why do I get the feeling your up to something?"
"Who, me?"
"Yes, you."
"I'm not up to anything." John turned his back to his partner as a sly grin spread across his face.
"If you say so." Roy conceded as he finished tying his boot laces. Captain Stanley poked his head into the locker room and called out to his men.
"Roll call in 5 minutes."
"Right Cap!" John responded as he finished dressing. He and Roy meandered over to the bay and lined up with the other men. Captain Stanley approached the 5 men with a look of surprise. He looked at his watch and then at his men.
"I don't believe it. Everyone is ready, on time? I think I'll have to mark the calendar." He proceeded to look over his clipboard and hand out assignments.
"Mike, you've got the dorms this shift. Marco and Roy, C-shift left some hose that needs hanging, you two can work on that. John, you've got latrine duty and Chet your cooking."
"Me, Cap? Cooking?" Chet asked surprised. He knew he had been assigned latrine duty for a month last shift.
"Do you have a problem with that, Kelly?" Stanley inquired.
"No sir, it's just that....."
"Are you questioning your superiors order?"
"Oh no, sir! I'd be more then happy to cook."
"I thought you would. OK, everybody. Let's get to work."
The crew of station 51 quickly dispersed and went about their business. Roy started to go into the back yard to hang hose but spied John on his way to the latrine.
"Hey!" He called. "What's up?"
"What do you mean, what's up?"
"How come you didn't balk when Cap gave you latrine duty instead of Chet?"
"Why would I balk? I haven't had latrine duty for a while. I'm just taking my turn."
"Yeah, right Gage." Roy said as he shook his head on his way out to help Marco. John smiled and whistled as he headed into the supply closet and picked up the equipment he needed to complete his chores.
*****************
"The engine's out of service for 30 minutes while Mike takes it over to the garage to get the headlight replaced, Chet. If you need to go to the store for groceries, do it now." Hank Stanley's voice echoed through the station.
"Right, Cap!" Chet replied as he headed out the back door to his station wagon.
John's eyes sparkled as he watched his target leave for the market.
St.Patrick's Day, what a perfect day for this, John thought as he went about to perform his evil deed. He carefully slipped into the bathroom and headed directly to the cubby hole area where the men kept their toiletry items. He giggled as he reached into his pocket and pulled out the bottle of green dye. In no time, his sabotage was complete and the evidence was disposed of in the dumpster out back.
Roy stood on top of the hose tower and watched as Johnny carried the trash bag out to the dumpster. He had a look of glee on his face that Roy had seldom seen. Not at all the look of a man banished to the latrines. He was definitely up to something, but what?
*****************
The day had been a quiet one. The squad and the engine had only been called out a handful of times and all minor incidents. As they climbed from their vehicle after their last call, Marco rubbed his stomach.
"Hey Chet, What's for chow?"
"It's St. Patrick's Day, what do you think?"
"Enchiladas?" Marco guessed.
"No!"
"Corned beef and cabbage?" Hank asked hopefully.
"No!"
"What then?" Roy wondered.
"Irish stew, what else!" Chet proclaimed raising his hands in the air.
"Irish stew!" The five men chorused.
"We had Irish stew last shift." Mike complained.
"That was DeSoto's version. I make REAL Irish stew." Chet informed them proudly.
"Whatever, as long as it's edible." Captain Stanley said in an attempt to stop the bickering from going on any longer.
"Don't worry, Cap. It will be an Epicurean delight."
"OK Chet, so get to work on this masterpiece so we can eat."
"It's already started, Cap. Just got to heat it up." Chet hustled into the kitchen and the men followed behind him. Marco and Mike got the dishes out of the cabinet and began to set the table. Johnny quickly poured glasses of milk for everyone and in no time the food was on the table. The men sat around the table as Chet set the huge pot in the middle. He dished out generous portions to each man and they had their forks poised in front of their mouths when..."
"ERRRRR....AHHHHHH......OOOOOOOO!" The tones sounded.
"Station 51 factory fire. 325 Ridgeway Avenue 3-2-5 Ridgeway Avenue Cross street Fairfeild. Time out 1710."
The men leapt from the table as Captain Stanley acknowledged the call. In seconds they were traveling down the street's of Carson heading to the fire.
*******************
The engine pulled up to a one story candy factory building. Smoke poured out of the windows and the north side was fully engulfed in flames. Three other engine companies had been called while 51's were on their way and they all hurried into position to battle the flames. Chet and Marco pulled a hose as did John and Roy. The water sprayed onto the flames as the quartet moved closer and closer to the source of the blaze.
"Over there!" Chet yelled, his voice muffled by the mask covering his face. John and Roy saw him pointing toward a large vat and underneath that vat was a worker who had become trapped. The two paramedics cut off their water and laid down the hose before running toward the trapped man.
"My leg's caught!" The man cried out as the two firefighters approached him. They quickly surveyed the situation that they faced. It seemed that the man had gotten his leg trapped when the frame work of a vat of corn syrup collapsed and fell onto the fleeing man.
"Where are you hurt?" Roy asked as he looked over the man.
"I don't think I am," he replied. "I just can't get my leg out!"
John ran his hand over the collapsed framework then turned to Roy.
"I think we're going to need the portapower."
"I'll get it." Roy said as he ran away from the scene. Marco and Chet worked diligently to keep the flames away from the trapped man. Other firefighters were working the blaze from the other side of the factory and the flames slowly but surely began to subside.
Within a few minutes Roy came back with the portapower. They positioned it under the crimped metal and began pumping the handle. After several seconds the man began to wiggle.
"It's working! My leg is getting loose." He exclaimed. As Roy worked the equipment, John moved under the vat and began pulling on the man.
"I think we can get him now, Roy," John cried out as he felt the victim beginning to break free of the metal that held him. Roy stopped pumping and grabbed him under his arms and pulled as John moved to the side and guided the man's body carefully.
John did not notice that the man's jacket had hooked onto the vat's faucet lever and as he was pulled clear, the faucet opened showering John with a healthy coating of the sticky substance. Roy could only move the victim out so fast, so John had to endure the gooey shower until the victim was far enough out that he could navigate around him.
When Roy finally looked up at his partner he couldn't help but laugh. John looked like a freshly hatched chicken with his feathers still wet. He tried to shake some of the substance off but it clung to his turnouts and oozed off helmet.
"You OK?" Roy asked as he looked at the disgusted face of his partner.
"Yeah, I'm fine." John said with annoyance.
"Hey, Wizard of Ooze!" Chet called from behind John. "You want us to hose you down?"
"I'll meet you outside," Roy said as he helped the injured man through the door.
"OK, Roy," John said then turned his attention to Chet and Marco. "OK, Spray me." John instructed. He raised his arms out from his sides so the water could circulate around his body. The only problem was the cold water seemed to make the goo on John turn thicker and stickier. After a few minutes he gave up on the venture and decided he better see if Roy needed any help.
By the time John made his way outside, Roy had already finished checking out the man and found no real injuries other the a few scrapes and bruises. He said he would go to his own doctor and signed their release form. Roy looked at John as he shook his head. He reached into the compartment of the squad and threw a blanket pack at his partner.
"What's this for?" John asked.
"Your not sitting in the squad in that condition. It's your choice, you can either wrap up in a blanket or ride in the back." Roy motioned to the narrow area that contained the extra air tanks.
"No, That's OK. I'll used the blanket."
"I thought you would." Roy began to pat John on the back, but when he saw the sticky shoulder in front of him, he changed his mind.
Captain Stanley came over to the two paramedics and looked John up and down.
"What in the hell happened to you?" He asked with raised eyebrows.
"I got slimed." John said flatly.
"I see." Hank said attempting not to laugh. "Well, we've got this thing pretty much wrapped up here. Why don't you two head home and get him cleaned up."
"Right Cap," Roy said as Hank walked back to the engine. "Are you about ready to go, Junior?"
John face contorted as he tried to move toward the squad. "I think I'm starting to harden, Roy."
Roy just shook his head. Leave it to his partner to get himself in a predicament like this. "Well, when we get back to the station, I'll get a hammer and chisel.
"Ha ha," John said with a sneer. "You really crack me up."
"I will, when we get back to the station." Roy assured him with a sly grin. John just rolled his eyes as he wrapped himself in the yellow blanket and climbed into the passengers side of the squad.
****************
What a sticky mess! The disposable blanket tore as Roy attempted to pull it away from John's turnouts. Long shreds of yellow hung from John as, piece by piece, they pulled away the material.
"I don't know how your ever going to get this cleaned off." Roy remarked as he stood back and looked at his friend. He looked mighty pitiful. The corn syrup had begun to harden when it hit the air and sugar crystals sparkled off John's hair and skin. John could feel his skin contracting as the syrup dried so he stretched and contorted his face in an attempt to crack his sugar coating.
"I feel like a glazed donut," John commented dryly, looking down at his shining appearance.
"You look like one too," Roy added with a smile. John did not appear as amused as his partner. "Maybe if we just let this goo dry out we'll be able to just chip it off." Roy suggested.
"Well, that's fine for my coat, but what about the rest of me?"
"I think a long, hot shower will do the trick."
"But the water just made it worse before." John whined.
"That was cold water. Try hot water and lots of soap." Roy said as he ushered his friend into the shower room. "Give me you clothes. I'll hang them up somewhere." John quickly shed his clothing, grabbed his soap and shampoo and jumped into the shower stall. The hot water felt good as is dripped over his body. He couldn't believe how much of the syrup had soaked through his clothing. He lathered up and scrubbed furiously, trying to remove the crunchy shell that coated his skin. After rinsing once he lathered up again. He was determined to get all the glaze off himself if he had to take off a layer or two of skin in the process.
When he was satisfied with the job he had done to his body he reached for the shampoo and began to wash the sweetness from hair. The dark brown strands felt like straw to his fingers as he worked the soap into a thick lather. After rinsing the first batch of suds from his head, he still felt clumps of candied tresses, so he decided to wash his hair again.
"Damn!" He mumbled as he realized his shampoo bottle was empty. Just then he heard someone walk into the room.
****************
Roy held Johnny's clothes a safe distance away from his body as he walked into the engine bay. He looked up when he heard the sound of the engine pulling back into the station. The men hopped off the truck and approached Roy, curiously looking at his burden.
"Whatcha got there, DeSoto?" Chet asked observing the clothing dangling from Roy's outstretched arms. "What did ya do? Melt the wicked paramedic of the west?"
Roy rolled his eyes and shook his head as he walk past Chet. "No. The syrup wasn't washing off, so we're gonna let it dry then try to peel it off. I'm gonna hang these outback. Is that OK, Cap?"
"Sure Roy. That's fine." Hank replied as Roy walked past them and out the back door. Chet smiled and giggled as he headed for the latrine. He ran the water in the sink and wet a paper towel then proceeded to wipe the soot off his face before washing his hands. The hot water from the running shower was steaming up the mirror and Chet had to take his hand to clear an area in order to see if he had done an adequate job.
"Hey!" Came John's voice from the shower stall. "Can I borrow your shampoo? I just ran out."
Chet went to his cubby hole, retrieved his bottle of shampoo and placed it into the outstretched hand of John Gage.
"Thanks!" John yelled over the sound of the running water, never glancing out to see who the shampoo bearer was. Chet finished his business and left the bathroom to join the rest of the crew in the kitchen while John finished his shower.
***************
"AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!" Came the scream from within the bathroom. The five men who sat around the kitchen table lept to their feet and ran into the latrine. Hank Stanley lead the pack and as he entered the tiled room he stopped dead in his tracks causing the four other men to plow, like dominoes, into his back.
"What the hell?????" Hank exclaimed at the sight standing in front of him. The men behind him spread out and looked wide eyed at their comrade.
The exposed skin of John's chest, shoulders and face had green streaks running all the way down him and disappearing underneath the towel he had draped around his waist. If that wasn't bad enough, his hands and hair were solid green making him look very much like a scrawny version of the Incredible Hulk. After the initial shock, the five men desolved into hysterical laughter.
"It's not funny!!" John shouted as he stared at his emerald green reflection in the mirror.
"What happened?" Roy asked as he moved closer to examine his pea-green partner. He reached out to peek under the towel only to have his hand slapped away by Johnny.
"You gave me Chet's shampoo! Why didn't you give me yours?"
"Me! I didn't give you anything!"
"Yes, you did! I told you I ran out of shampoo and asked if I could borrow yours."
"Johnny, I was in the kitchen. I didn't give you anything!"
"Well then, who did?" John asked looking at the rest of his crewmates. Everyone just shook their heads except for Chet. He held his stomach and laughed so hard he had to lean against the wall for support.
"What are you laughing at, Chet?" John snapped. After a few seconds Chet was able to regain his composure enough to speak.
"Man, Gage. You are pathetic! You can't even pull a simple prank without screwing it up!"
John suddenly became defensive stammering as he spoke."What...what are you....talking a..about?"
"I'm the one who gave you the shampoo. My shampoo!" Chet informed him.
"So?"
"So, you already knew it was my shampoo. How come you knew my shampoo had the green dye in it? Huh?"
"Well......."
"Well, what Gage? Did your little caper backfire? Heehee!!!!! You should know better then to try and catch the phantom at his own game. No one can ever beat the phantom. BWHAAHAAAHAAAA!!!!!!!" Chet's laughter echoed throughout the station as he walked back to the kitchen.
"I thought this little plan of yours was fool proof." Hank said as he circled his paramedic, eyeing him up and down.
"It would have been if Roy had handed me the right shampoo." John moved and shouted in Roy's face.
"Hey, don't blame me for your failed plan." Roy exclaimed, poking John in the shoulder with his finger as his face turned red. "I wasn't even in the room!"
"Well, you should have been!" John insisted. Hank moved in between the arguing pair, separating them with his hands.
"That's enough. Face it, John. Your plan back fired, plain and simple. Now, get back in the shower and see if any of that will come off. Come on, Roy. Let's go see if we can warm up some of that Irish stew. I'm starving."
"Right, Cap," Roy said as the pair left John alone to deal with his plight.
****************
"Well, Chet. I have to admit." Roy said as he leaned back in his chair and patted his belly. "That was delicious."
"Thanks, Roy." Chet said smiling. "It takes a special Irish touch to make the perfect Irish stew."
"Yes, wonderful meal." Marco agreed. "But it could have used a little more spice." He rose from the table and motioned for Mike. "Come on, Mike. Give me a hand with the dishes."
"Sure thing, Marco. Good stew, Chet."
The men began to clear the table as John finally walked into the room. His hair is still bright GREEN but his face and skin had lightened a bit. He wore a white T-shirt and a pair of turnout pants and boots.
"Hey, Kermit!" Chet exclaimed. "How are things on the lily pad?"
"Shut up, Chet!" John said through clenched teeth as he stared at the man with narrowed eyes. He looked around the table at the empty bowls of food. "Did you leave me anything to eat?" He asked with a whine to his voice.
"There's more in the pot on the stove." Chet informed him, as he reclined on the back rungs of his chair. John sat at the table and looked around.
"Where's my plate?" He wondered.
"I'm not your maid, Gage." Chet retorted. "It's in the cabinet. Get it yourself." John glared at the man through narrowed eyes before standing and walking to the cupboard.
"BOINGGGGGGG!!!!!"
The Phantoms catapult sent a thick, green glob hurtling John's way.
"SPLATTTTT!!!"
John stood, stunned, as the thick, creamy, green goop dripped down his face and clean T-shirt. The rest of the crew burst into laughter as John again walked right into the clutches of the phantom.
Roy moved over to his paralyzed partner and examined the green gunk closer. Reaching out a hand, he ran his finger down John's cheek collecting a sample of the gooey substance then brought it to his mouth.
"Pastachio pudding," He reported as John glared at him through his veil of gack.
"Will he ever learn," Chet said as he stood and walked out of the kitchen. He smiled and winked at the little man who sat on top of the squad in a green derby hat and suit.
"BWHAAHAAAHAAA!!!!!!" Echoed throughout the station as the Phantom slipped back into the shadows.
THE END