Broccoli Surprise
"What's for dinner," John Gage asked as he and Roy DeSoto returned from a run one Friday night. They had grown tired of the different kinds of chili that Marco Lopez served during their shifts - beef chili, corn chili, vegetable chili, even turkey chili on Thanksgiving. But their stomachs were rumbling, and only one word came into their minds: Food.
"If I have to eat Marco's chili again, I'll ask Chet for another bag of figs," said Roy. Roy remembered the crash diet that Chet Kelly subjected the rest of the A-squad to a little while ago. After Dr. Morgan voiced his concerns about the food that firefighters ate, Chet threw out the fried chicken and chili because they were "bad" for their health. All John and Roy were left with were a few saltine crackers, a head of lettuce, and possibly a bag of figs for their so-called dinner. Even a Big Mac Attack - complete with heart-clogging fat and diet-ruining calories - was a huge improvement over this imposed hunger strike!
On their way to the kitchen, the paramedics were stopped by Chet Kelly, who was wearing a white chef's hat and an apron. The chef's hat read "Kiss the Cook", as did the apron.
"Don't go in here," whispered Chet. "Beyond this point is top secret."
"Why not," asked Roy.
"Is this another one of your tricks, Chet," cried John.
"Shhhh!" Then, Chet turned his head to Mike Stoker, who was preparing something on the stove. He then turned back to John and Roy: "Mike is cooking what could be the greatest thing since the hamburger -"
Captain Stanley was watching the news on TV. From the kitchen, he hissed, "Kelly! Will you keep your big mouth shut?!"
"Alright, Captain." Then, looked into John's brown eyes and said, "Mike's gotten into this vegetarian kick lately, and he's been telling us that meat is bad for us, that eating cows and chickens is wrong -"
Roy DeSoto started into the kitchen, saying, "I'm going to set that Stoker straight. What is a chicken good for except a barrel of Kentucky Fried Chicken?"
Chet stopped him. "Roy," he admonished, "I wouldn't go in there if I were you."
"Since when can't I go into my own firehouse kitchen?"
John Gage tore the chef's hat off Chet Kelly's curly black head. "Take that stupid thing off," he said, throwing it on the floor. "You look silly in it."
"Hey, Gage! That's my hat!" The paramedics walked into the washroom, ignoring Chet as he continued, "I can't pick this up with my bare hands. It'll contaminate the food."
Just then, Mike turned towards Chet and uttered the magical words: "Dinner's ready."
Though Mike's words were soft and even-tempered, they were audible enough for Johnny and Roy to tear out of the washroom, their hands freshly washed for dinner. In the kitchen, they sat around the table, topped with a skillet holding six patties - HAMBURGERS!!! They were covered with barbeque sauce and sauteed onions.
Why was Chet trying to hide something, thought Roy, as he lifted the burger patty onto his kaiser bun. John, who was squirting ketchup and mustard on his hamburger, thought the same thing, before biting into it. The patty had a soft and rather different texture about it, he thought again, and most of the firefighters in the kitchen felt the same way.
"Hey, Mike, this is good," John spoke up.
"It is different alright," commented Chet, as he bit into his A-1 sauce-drenched sandwich. "So, what kind of meat did you put in it? Is it chicken?"
"Nope." Mike shook his head.
Roy enquired, "Is it ostrich?"
Hank Stanley interjected, "Who eats ostriches, DeSoto?"
"I ate moose once. It tastes better than beef."
Mike said, sitting behind his hamburger, "I've been coming up with new and better ways to eat vegetables," he said, "and I know you guys would rather eat figs than broccoli, cauliflower and that stuff."
"You can say that again," mumbled Marco Lopez.
Mike continued, "So, I experimented with something new during Susan's birthday party last Saturday."
"Go on, go on," said an interested if impatient Captain Stanley.
"I took a few stalks of broccoli - Susan hates broccoli - and mashed it with a few other vegetables that kids hate, including cauliflower and mushrooms. What I came up with," Mike smiled, holding his burger into the air, "was the world's first veggie burger. The kids just loved it!"
The rest of the station clamored with interested if confused voices.
"Veggie burger," cried John Gage. Roy DeSoto lowered his burger to listen to his partner and friend: "Mike Stoker could make a fortune selling those things."
"It'll certainly give McDonald's a run for its money," said Roy.
Chet spoke, "I think Mike should cook us dinner more often."
"Just as long as he doesn't go back to broccoli stalks in cheese sauce -"
Dinner was interupted by the claxon. It was followed by the dispatcher, who spoke, "Station 51, house fire..."
Perhaps someone set the house on fire while experimenting with her own bright ideas, the firefighters thought, as they raced towards their trucks and drove into the night.
"Foodfight" copyright 1999 Irene Majokra. "Emergency"! and its characters copyright Mark VII Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. No infringement of any copyrights or trademarks is intended or should be inferred. This is a work of fiction, and any similarity to actual persons or events is purely coincidental.
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