Before The Dawn
March 10, 1999
Rain beat down furiously on the roof of the old two-story house. A loud crack of thunder accompanied by a bright flash of lightening caused the electricity to flicker out for a few moments. The red letters on the bedside clock flashed 2:45 AM. Johnny stretched in the bed; he hated this time of the day. It seemed that time always stopped for him in the wee hours of the morning.
"Johnny, is everything all right?" The drowsy voice of his wife touched him.
"Yeah, power just went out for a minute, that's all. I'd better go check the computer." Johnny said as he pulled his robe on and slipped out of bed.
Rachel was accustomed to his early morning roaming. When they first married ten years ago it unnerved her. Once or twice a week she would roll over to find him gone. She tried to go and sit with him, talk to him, but to no avail. All other times he was warm and open, but in the wee hours before dawn he seemed lost to her.
*******
Johnny hit the start button on the coffee maker and headed for the office. He wanted to make sure that his computer hadn't been damaged when the power went out. He'd had a fit learning to use the damn thing, but it was the vital link in their practice. Besides, it was the time of the day when the worst always seemed to happen, he needed to make sure that he could communicate with the Trauma Center that was 50 miles away. Johnny looked around the office waiting for the computer to load up. It had been twelve years since Johnny had agreed, at Roy's urging, to be a part of the Emergency Clinic Pilot Program. The ECPP was the brainchild of Roy and Dr. Brackett, designed to put Paramedics into outlying areas to provide emergency care twenty-four hours a day. The program provided for a house with an examining room and all of the supplies. What started out as a small program had blossomed with advances in computer technology. Now by linking up via computer to the hospital he could provide everything from antibiotics for earaches to invasive emergency stabilization procedures.
"Emergency room, what do you have John?"
"Good morning Aimee. I'm just checking on the computer link. We had a power outage."
Aimee was one of the first people that Johnny met had met in Northern California. She was the night triage nurse who answered all of the video phone calls from outlying clinics. They had started in the ECPP together and had watched it grow. She was also the one who had introduced him to his wife, and he would be forever grateful.
"You're coming through just fine, give us a call back if you need us. I'd talk longer but I have another call coming through." Aimee said hurriedly.
"See you later, Aimee." Johnny said as he disconnected the phone call.
Johnny sat staring at the pictures in the office. Rachel didn't appreciate it very much when he called it "his" office. He learned that lesson a long time ago. Rachel had been a rookie paramedic for a small ambulance service. She had grown up in the isolated areas of Northern California and desperately wanted to join the program. She worked lots of extra shifts at the Emergency Department so that she could get enough patient contact hours to join the Outreach Program. It also seemed that Aimee put them together every chance she got. For a while, Johnny resisted the temptation. He had come up north to heal, not to fall in love; besides he was twelve years older than the pretty brunette was. When he finally was moved into this house to open the clinic, Aimee placed Rachel there to be a part time volunteer assistant. He'll never forget the day he came into the office and found her straightening his files.
"What in the hell are you doing to my files." Johnny roared, it had already been a bad day and he was looking for any reason to argue.
"These records are a mess, how are we going to know what is going on around here if you can't keep a patient's chart in a decent order." Rachel was sick of his inefficiency with paperwork.
"I do a good job with my patients, even if their files aren't perfect. Besides, it's my office, why don't you keep your nose out of my files." Johnny continued to rant.
"John Gage, you may be the senior person here, but this is OUR office. I was assigned to work here, just like you were. I would appreciate it if you would remember that in the future. If not, this office can go to hell without me, and so can you." She'd had enough of his superior attitude and condescending behavior. Rachel turned smartly on her heel and stormed out of the house, slamming the door for good measure.
Johnny smiled at the memory of her stubbornness. She was right, and it wasn't a week later that he went over to her apartment and begged her to come back. Besides, Rachel was a damn good medic, and her obsession with patient files would prove useful time and time again. He enjoyed working with her so much, that nothing was right when she wasn't around. Finally, after working together for a year, he realized that he was in love with her. They started seeing each other and one year later they were married.
Johnny was shaken from his revere by the sound of Rachel in the kitchen. He looked at the clock on the wall, almost five am. He wandered off to the kitchen for a cup of coffee. Rachel was standing at the coffeepot, pouring two cups.
"Good morning Rach, sorry if I woke you." He wrapped his arms around her very pregnant belly and kissed her cheek gently. It seemed that they were never going to have this baby. They had tried for five years to get pregnant and nothing seemed to work. The years had gone by and they had given up, then one day last year, she was pregnant. He wondered again if he was too old to be a daddy.
Rachel turned to face him; she loved the way he held her. She wrapped her arms loosely around his neck and buried her face against his chest. Johnny was a good foot taller than she was, she always felt safe when he held her against him.
"That's okay, I've got some work to do in the office anyway." She sighed and turned to hand him his cup of coffee. Rachel was getting used to these early mornings when Johnny couldn't sleep.
********
Johnny was reviewing last week's medical charts at the kitchen table when the office phone rang, he heard Rachel pick it up.
"Emergency clinic, Rachel Gage speaking. Roy! Hey its great to hear your voice, how's Joanne and Jen? The baby is fine, I just wish that Johnny would quit babying me. Let me get him for you." Even before she called his name Johnny was by her side.
"Hey Pally, everything okay?" Johnny was always concerned when Roy called early.
"Junior, sure everything is fine. I just have some bad news for you." Roy seemed awful excited for delivering bad news. "I have to send somebody up there from the home office next week to do your yearly review."
"Damn, is it that time of year again?" Johnny hated having a stranger poking around his office. Not that he had anything to worry about, Rachel and he had one of the best records in the Outreach Program. "So what pencil pushing geek are you sending up this time?"
"Well, Joanne and I need a vacation, so I thought I'd bring my pencil pushing self up there to nose around. If that is okay with you and Rachel? " Roy was excited to see his old friend, but things had been kind of strained since the accident over a decade ago.
"Sure, that would be great. Rachel has been pushing me to have you two come up for a week. We'd be happy to have you on one condition, you have to stay with us." Johnny could use a visit with his old partner.
"Don't have much choice on where to stay; your place is the only wheel chair accessible house in two counties." Roy laughed, but somehow it wasn't quite funny.
"Well be driving up from LA on Sunday night. See you then."
"Bye Roy, see you in three days." Johnny hung up the phone to Rachel's questions. "Roy and Joanne will be here Sunday night to do the yearly review. Is that going to work for you?"
**************
The three days passed in a flurry of activity. Despite the fact that the office files were perfect, Rachel insisted on going over them again. In addition to the office work and the occasional patient to attend to, Rachel seemed to dust everything that didn't move. Johnny was glad to have his old friends coming for a visit, but hated the craziness that ensued before hand. He also worried about her working so hard when she was only a month away from giving birth. He couldn't argue it with her, she would just say "I'm pregnant, not dying." Rachel had finally taken a break, now that everything was ready, and she was snuggled against Johnny on the couch reading when the headlights flashed through the front window.
"They're here." She jumped up with a squeal and grabbed Johnny's hand. They had barely gotten off the porch when Joanne grabbed Rachel in a huge hug. With very little regard for their men, they went laughing into the house toward the kitchen.
"Too bad our wives don't get along, hey Junior?" Roy laughed "Do me a favor, grab the chair out of the backseat for me."
"Sure Roy," Johnny crossed to the back of the car "It sure has been way too long, its great to see you again." Johnny pushed the small black wheelchair up next to the driver's seat and helped Roy get himself settled. Roy grabbed the younger man's hand in a hearty handshake and headed up the ramp to the livingroom.
"I never thought the time would come when I'd see you like this Johnny. A house in the middle of nowhere and a beautiful wife, not just a token woman, but one who can keep you in your place. I know its been 12 years since I sent you up here, but I never thought you'd ever settle down. Now you're going to be a daddy, go figure, Johnny Gage, a daddy." Roy laughed, shaking his head. Things had turned out better than he had hoped for Johnny, he couldn't be more pleased.
"Come on lets get you inside. Rachel has been cooking all day and you guys are probably starved." Johnny grabbed a hold of the handles on Roy's chair. Johnny would never get used to seeing Roy like this. It had been fourteen years since the accident that put Roy into this chair. Even now, so many years later, it seemed like yesterday. It was the middle of the night when the call came in, 2am to be exact. It was a small apartment building that was fully involved when they arrived on the scene. A young woman with a small infant was trapped on the 2nd floor, too scared to move. Roy knew that it wasn't safe, but they charged into that building anyway. It took only a few moments to reach the second floor and Johnny grabbed the baby and Roy the woman. They were almost out of the building, just 15 more feet and they would have made it. That's when all hell broke loose. There was a sickening crackle of burning wood and the pop of a beam on the second floor giving away. Roy saw it coming and shoved the young mother out of the way; that's when the ceiling came down. Somehow Roy survived a good blow to the head and a ruptured spleen, but the beam that caught his lower back crushed his spine and paralyzed him from the waist down.
"Isn't Rachel just the prettiest mother-to-be you've ever seen?" Joanne was fusing over her when Roy and Johnny came into the kitchen.
"We'll have your relief up here in two weeks, that way you'll have plenty of time to make it into the hospital." Roy had arranged for someone to come in and run the clinic while they were in the hospital.
"I'm not to worried about it, Johnny can take care of us if we don't make it to the hospital." Rachel laughed and patted her expanding abdomen.
"No way! It's one thing to deliver somebody else's baby, I don't want to deliver my own." Johnny had no intention of seeing his wife have their baby all alone miles away from a doctor.
The days passed quickly and the old friends enjoyed themselves immensely. For all of Johnny's bravado and laughter, things didn't seem quite right to Rachel. His middle of the night wanderings seemed to increase with the presence of Roy. Only once since their arrival five days ago had he slept the whole night through. Sitting at the breakfast table on the morning of the sixth day, Rachel found herself alone with Roy. Maybe he had the answers that she wanted so desperately to find.
"Roy, you spent a lot of nights with Johnny at the station, was he always such an insomniac?" Rachel broached the subject carefully.
"Not usually. Most of the time he slept like a rock. Why do you ask?" Roy was puzzled by her bizarre question.
"Ever since I have known him he has this thing with getting up at around 2 or 3 o'clock in the morning. If he sleeps past that time, he'll sleep all night. If not, he never goes back to sleep." Rachel hoped she wasn't being too nosy.
"I know that after my accident he had some trouble sleeping. Then there was the accident that caused him to leave the department. I think he blamed himself for what happened, even though I told him it wasn't his fault." Roy said.
"He told me about your accident, but he never said anything about the one that involved Chris." Rachel hoped she wasn't prying.
"Well, my son Chris had grown up to be just like his old man, joining the fire department. He and Johnny even rode together in Squad 51 for six months. I had begun working with Dr. Brackett on the Emergency Clinic Pilot Program, fighting to get it off the ground. Chris and Johnny would come into the hospital and we would talk about everything. I think having Chris around was finally helping Johnny to cope with what happened to me. There was an arson fire in an old warehouse and Station 51 got the call. It was one of those middle of the night calls that everyone dreads, around 2:15 in the morning is what Johnny said. There was a report of victims still inside. Chris was sent in with Marco and Chet on the hose. This was a particularly nasty arsonist, and he was out to get firefighters. Johnny was coming in behind them and had just cleared the door when the bomb went off. There was nothing he could have done. He got to Chris first; he had a huge shard of debris in his left chest. Chet was already gone by the time Johnny got to him. He was practically on top of the bomb when it blew. The wall he hit shattered his skull. Marco was on the end of line. He was the only one of the three who survived the blast. Johnny came straight to our house from the hospital. I will never be able to repay Johnny for coming to the house that morning to tell Joanne and I in person what happened to Chris. He was crying when we answered the door, I knew the worst had happened. I think that was probably the hardest thing Johnny has ever had to do." Roy's voice cracked with emotion.
"Oh God, I had no idea. He would never talk about. Could he still be blaming himself? Both your accident and Chris' occurred in the early morning hours. I just wish he would talk to somebody about it." Rachel was beginning to understand his roaming. She would have liked to talk more, but Johnny came into the kitchen, and the conversation turned to happier times.
Johnny just couldn't sleep; he had to many things on his mind. The clock beside the bed said that it was almost 2am. He rolled out of bed without waking Rachel. Afraid of making enough noise to wake the house, he slipped out onto the front porch.
"Hey Junior, what are you doing roaming around this time of night?" Roy's sleepy voice interrupted the silence.
"Sorry, I don't usually wake anybody." Johnny stared ahead into the darkness. He didn't even hear Roy get up, he was so lost in his own thoughts. Johnny heard the sound of Roy's chair moving in beside him on the porch.
"Rachel says that this is a pretty regular thing for you." Roy hoped he wasn't pushing too much.
"Yeah, sometimes." Johnny was in no mood to talk and the silence hung heavy between them.
"I don't think I ever really thanked you for telling me about Chris personally. I couldn't have dealt with a phone call or a stranger coming to the door." Roy watched his friend's face contort in pain.
"If it had been me, that's the way I would have wanted it. I just can't forget--." Johnny had held on to the pain too long, he finally broke. "I hate this time of day, nothing good ever happens. I lost you as a partner and then I couldn't keep your son alive. If I had taken the search lead like I was supposed to--" Johnny was crying and couldn't continue.
"If you had taken the lead, I'd have lost my best friend. I love you and I loved my son. I'm just glad that you were there for him." Roy was beginning to cry as well. "I have never blamed you."
"I blame myself." Johnny's statement was stopped by the sound of the screen door. Rachel stood there, crying and visibly frightened.
"Johnny, my water just broke." Johnny was at her side in less than a heartbeat.
"Lets get you into the office." Johnny led her gently to the exam room table.
"God, Johnny, it's too early. I'm not due for three more weeks. I don't want to lose this baby."
"It's going to be all right, we are going to take care of you." Johnny tried to sound confident, but he was terrified.
"I'll go connect to the hospital." Roy wheeled to the computer.
Johnny settled his wife and pulled on a pair of gloves.
"I have to check you, honey." Johnny's hands were shaking.
"It hurts so bad." Rachel was crying.
"When did the pains start." Roy asked. "Why isn't this computer linking up?"
"Yesterday, but I thought they were just Braxton-Hicks contractions, they had no regularity. My back has ached on and off all night. I thought I just strained myself. I am so stupid, I should have known." Rachel was trying to calm herself.
"Roy, we don't have time for the computer, she is fully dilated and I can see the baby's head. I can't believe this is happening." It seemed to Johnny that time was repeating itself.
"Okay, I may be in this chair, but I can still deliver a baby. You handle the oxygen and the vitals." Roy had taken over as the doctor and Johnny moved to hold his wife's pale hand. "Okay Rachel, push."
Johnny lifted her carefully from the low table to give her better leverage. Joanne had slipped in, awakened by the commotion and taken over nursing duties, doing all she could to help. All of a sudden the baby was out. Everyone in the room held their breath as Roy suctioned the airway waiting for a cry. It began weakly but increased in pitch and volume.
"It's a boy." Roy announced joyfully. "He's small but he looks healthy. Time of birth, 2:52 am."
Roy wrapped the baby up in a warm blanket and held him out to the waiting arms of his mother. She cuddled him close and kissed his head. He looked just like his father, a fluffy mass of dark hair with eyes that were already dark.
"Roy," Johnny whispered, "I'd like you to meet your Godson; John Christopher Gage."
"I guess this proves that not everything that happens in the wee hours of the morning is bad, hey Junior." Roy said wiping a tear from his eyes.
"Before The Dawn" ©1999 Barbara Black. "Emergency!" and its characters © Mark VII Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. No infringement of any copyrights or trademarks is intended or should be inferred. This is a work of fiction, and any similarity to actual persons or events is purely coincidental.
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